Saturday, July 18, 2009

from, "BIKE PARTYYYYY!" to "ugh bike party....": the ballad of sjbikeparty.

tonight/today i participated in sj bike party. thinking ahead this time, i decided to take my car so i can get home in one piece. my buddies and i were to meet at the san carlos st starbucks. after forgetting about how far san carlos starbucks is, i decided to park the buggernaut at the 4th st garage: across the street from the end of the route san jose state. so i parked and off i went onto san carlos. on my way i passed an older dude on a converted as well as the people who tow the couch. lucky for me i caught up to the guys before starbucks. after a rest stop to get free water, we headed over to dicks center. when there, we found out that there was a ska ish band playing at tacos mexicano. pretty dope. however, people keps rolling into dicks until the parking lot was FULL of cyclists. last bike party i went to had waaaaaay less people- considerably less than half of that crowd could have accounted for the last bike party i participated in. while there, there were people handing out donuts for free. now using chicoan logic- never take or consume a sketchy pastry. then i found out the donuts arent sketchy, just hella good- i regretted dropping mine "accidentally" for the sake of safety.

the theme was no pants. and there were people who were literally riding in their underwear- my neighbor terrence took his knickers off before the ride started. so we were off, to a slow pace. our group split in two then met back up again. when the first rest stop came around it dawned on us: there had to be about 3000 people at bike party. after 10-15 minutes of waiting, the end of the bike flow was nowhere in sight. it was epic seeing these bikes endlessly flow into the parking lot. then it got kind of irritating. and it didn't help that the hipster towing the pa speaker that was bumping miike snow happened to have a dance party in front of us. i estimate that there were about 3000 people there. yes, 3000.

on the way to the second stop, i kinda took things slow and looked around for once. there was a scooter with a disc wheel, alot of converted fixed gears, a handful of people adorning spandex, drunks, it was all there. we rolled into the second stop where there was an even smaller parking lot. luckily, the organizers got the message: this was hella people. so we didnt spend alot of time in that parking lot.

now here is where the fun begins.

before the 3rd stop there was an option to go up and down a hill (the one near branham high) after a yell sesh with the dudes i was riding with- we decided to take the hill on; not before someone fell onto my back wheel and startled the sh*t out of me. it kinda went like this @00:40 and 1:25:

since living in chico i tend to underestimate hills because of the relatively flat landscape. sooooooo i was hootin and hollerin all the way up the hill. funny i should mention chico, i bumped into a dude i met at chico that lived in my building. thats when you know bike party is big. i made it up the hill and it wasnt all that bad- until we started descend down the hill. this was the sketchiest thing i have ever ridden in my life. first off you have these dudes zipping past- im okay with bombing hills but with that many drunks and people zipping past, doing a whipskid to slow might simulate a wall to these people. once i got into a clear area i bombed the sh*t out of that hill. i found myself, though, dodging a helmet that came off a guys head in front of me. scariest sh*t of my life. when we got to the bottom of the hill, i was still going stupid fast. then i heard " LEFTTTT!!" meaning, at the next light, go left which was simple enough but no simple when youre hitting mid 20's in the speed department and the cluster that zipped past you has formed a cluster at the intersection. i took the turn in a HELLA WIDE skid veering away from the cluster but still going fast enough to pass the cluster. pretty awesome stuff if you ask me.

i had lost my group since we split going up the climb, but i was eager to catch up. er go, i picked up the pace. by this time, i realized that families would come out of their houses to watch the large amount of bikes on the road. being in the suburban area of san jose, none seemed frightened or threatened- they all had smiles towards this seemingly random mass of metal, rubber, and alcohol. during my search for andrew, terrence and kris the most random thing happened. a random girl that came out of a house started running with the bikes. however, this girl had nothing but a towel on. WTF. as i pedaled past there was another girl that was IN the flow of bike traffic that pretty much flashed everyone since she couldnt hold on to her towel. it was amusing and apparently, my group didnt see it- they were too far ahead.

i finally caught up, and from then on i stuck with them. the 4th stop was my piss break. i couldnt hold it any longer. i found myself on meridian street and therefore, knew where i was for the first time in a while. we had made it to downtown, and decided not to go to the campus- with that many people, stupidity ensues. instead we headed on to 7-11 on tenth street. the guys went in to get stuff, and i stayed outside to play bodyguard. then, more randomness occurs. first off, a beamer with a latino dude pulls up and asks me "hey, excuse me but do you happen to know where we could buy some tree?" i shrugged and said sorry i dont know- as those words escaped into the atmosphere 2 hobos pull up: one with a boombox, another on a bike. the one on the bike asks everyone for some change so he can get a ride on the bus. however- i dont think the bus runs that late... the beamer got the hell away, while me and my buddies were stuck with the bums. the guy with the bike was really trying to get our money, and the dude with the boombox kept insisting that i was don king. in the end, i ended up giving the guy with the boombox a hi five and terrence ended up full on hugging the dude with the bike. i dont know how we got to that point, but it happened.

all in all, bikeparty was alright. i dont know how much longer bike party can last however. the sheer size of it has made it become out of hand. im sorry, but there has to be some reform.

oh yeah, find me.


No comments: